People sometimes say, when faced with the prospect (real or imagined) of a not-so-good situation, “I would rather die”. We know death is usually not an option, and that the proposed deal is meaningless, yet we continue to make this kind of deal, regardless of its power.
I frequently attempt this myself, especially when it comes to dealing with pain or discomfort. I struggle periodically with anxiety issues. Thankfully, the effect this has on my day-to-day life now is small, but there have been times when I have tried to make deals to get rid of it.
A common “bargain” I used to propose when the anxiety seemed too much went something like this (for context, I also battle on-and-off with runner’s knee): I would rather have pain in my knees every day for the rest of my life – but please take away the fear.
(I’ve always been a deal-maker – apparently, by the age of two, I was bargaining with my mum about bedtime, and suggesting what she would have to do to make me agree to go to bed.)
But physical pain (to me, anyway) seems much easier to handle than emotional or mental pressure. Perhaps the more tangible nature of the pain makes it easier to manage. There’s a physical problem with a physical solution – be it a hot water bottle, painkillers or physiotherapy. But a problem that you can’t point to and say “that’s where it hurts” seems much more difficult to approach.
Who was I bargaining with, anyway? God? I’m pretty sure that’s not the way he works – he wouldn’t need to make a deal with us, to exchange one kind of pain for another. In fact, he’s made a deal to exchange all that’s bad for all that’s perfect. He’s already offered the ultimate exchange in Jesus – the only one we’ll ever truly need.
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